Irie

Life is not measured by how much one owns. Luke 12:15


What an unbelievable couple of days. We started work yesterday and I was placed at "Donna's house." This is really a group of houses where Miss Donna lives, along with her relatives and children. I still don't know the entire background of the people but they're all suffering from some kind of disability. Our job was to paint her house blue and paint another, much larger house, green. IsleGo has been working with Donna's compound for years but this was the first time I'd ever had the opportunity to be there. After driving through de bush we arrived and I immediately saw Elise coming through the walkway. We unloaded the bus and realized we brought water paint instead of oil paint. This meant we would be left with only two gallons of green paint and a whole lot of time before the paint would be exchanged. When I'm saying "houses" I really mean "shelters" and when I say "compound" I mean "many shelters put in a common area in the middle of the forest." Some of the houses were made out of pieces of wood (all shapes and sizes) nailed together with pieces of metal thrown over the top for the roof. There are all sorts of animals running around... including but not limited to: dogs with their puppies, cats with their kittens, chickens/roosters/chicks and you can't forget the babies! Some of the sweetest kids I've ever met are at this site and are all desperate for attention and love. Their shower was made in the back of the house out of pieces of sheet metal with linoleum laid over cement for the floor and a hose that could be attached to a tap. They also attached pieces of a mirror next to the faucet... unbelievable innovation. Without any kind of garbage service, the garbage in their area needs to be burned. Their burn pile was about a yard away from one of the houses and constantly blowing through the windows.

It didn't take long to use up the paint we had available, which meant time with the kids. We played some duck, duck goose, ring around the rosie and colored pictures. I stepped back at one point and saw three of the biggest, strongest, football-playing high schoolers I've ever seen running around with kids on their shoulders. These kids are wearing clothes that barely fit them, only one little boy was wearing shoes, the only toys in sight were the bright colored bubbles and nerf balls brought by the team and there wasn't one individual on the entire field that didn't have a gigantic smile plastered on their face. The majority of kids I've had a chance to be around on this island have little to no father or adult male influence and just seeing this interaction gave me a world of hope for these kids.

Today...

Today started great and ended at a point where my heart couldn't have possibly reached a better place. Not only did we have festival & fritters for breakfast but it was patty day. Aside from food, I can't even explain the bond that has grown between myself and Dorrett, Alma and Melva in the kitchen. I wake up in the morning and genuinely look forward to seeing Dorrett's smiling face and hearing her respond "I AM BLESSED" when I ask her how she is in the morning. I have grown the closest with Dorrett but each of them has something so genuine about them that I can't help but love them. Today I was going to the Bright Beginners graduation so I told them that's where I was headed in the afternoon. At the end of the day, they asked for every detail as to how my day was and remembered the smallest details of what I'd previously told them. Later on, Dorrett asked whether or not I liked fish. I told her that I was sure the team would be happy with the fish she was making and she stopped me and said, "no, Katie. I asked if YOU liked fish because if YOU don't like fish I'm not going to make it." It's always nice to have somebody to talk to but it's entirely different when you meet people that you share a mutual unconditional love with.

Bright Beginner's graduation was adorable. This year they only had 5 graduating but still had a full ceremony and very enthusiastic parents! We didn't get started until an hour after the start-time but I was able to sit and play with a sweet little girl who could not have been more proud of her beautiful, twirly dress and heels. The kids all recited poems, songs and accepted their awards for various accomplishments. It's hard to believe that Cynthia is the same person that I met a few years ago after all of the things she's been through. After talking to her for a few minutes today, her one consistent statement was, "I still have hope."

On the ride home, I knew Ryan was supposed to be at the villas but wasn't sure if he'd confirmed with anybody in terms of a ride. I haven't seen him yet and have been feeling like I've neglected him. When we pulled in my heart started racing out of the possibility of him being there. Over the past year or so, Ryan has become a brother to me. We immediately connected and I've felt a connection with him from the day we met... he is one of the most curious, brilliant and inspiring people I've ever met and to say that he's a friend would be an understatement. For anybody that doesn't know, Ryan is 23 and living in the infirmary in Priory, JA because he is paralyzed from the waist down. The infirmary is filled with (mostly) elderly people with illnesses, no family, deformities, mental illnesses and essentially no hope. We've called it the drop off for the unwanted and today I heard a different term that was essentially saying "your time is up." The fact that he's living there is devastating but to know the kind of potential he has with the right care is even more upsetting.

When we pulled into the villas I saw my group from Miramar pushing his wheelchair down to the villas as we passed. We had to park at the other villas, so I immediately got off of the bus and ran (in my skirt and little wedges) down to Miramar. Trying to play it cool, I slowed down by the entrance and could see him looking down at pictures with the team surrounding him. They all opened a space and turned his chair to face me before I heard somebody say, "Ryan, look who's back." I had absolutely no idea how emotionally invested I've been in his life but for some reason when I saw him and his face light up, I gave him a big hug and started sobbing. Seeing him outside of the infirmary, where he should be, was one of the most emotional experiences I've ever had in my life. From that moment on (with a brief kleenex break) we sat and talked...and talked and talked and talked. Marie and I brought the table down from the patio so we didn't have to move him up the stairs and had dinner outside. Once we were done eating, we made our way down to the water where the team was having mass and listened in. Michelle, Ryan and I sat in the back and arrived just in time to hear kids share their experiences from the day. As I was listening and hearing teenagers talk about their lives being changed, looking over and seeing Ryan, Michelle and the ocean I had my first full-body "wow" moment of this summer. One person shared about Ryan and how much they wished they could be more like him with his faith and attitude. Things are really put into perspective when you meet people every day that have no complaints, only gratitude for what they do have in their lives. I can't imagine where I'd be without these people in my life and am so grateful to have them to remind me that we're surrounded by blessings if we'd only open our eyes.

After mass, Ryan gave his speech. He was really nervous and had me sit up next to him, which was unnecessary after hearing him talk! It was hands-down one of the best talks I've ever heard with a group. He's so open to answering questions and has such a straight forward way of dealing with anything that everybody was interested in what he had to say. He shared the story of how he was injured and what it was like growing up. He shared details about living in the infirmary and his faith. Last summer, I would go sit with Ryan and he would ask me questions about what it means to be a Christian. He didn't have a Bible or read scripture and really didn't have as much interest in getting involved with any kind of faith as he did learning about it. Today, during his speech, people were asking what his wants and needs were. His answer was, "What I want would be a touch phone, games for wii, movies and to get out of the infirmary, but the only thing that I need is the Lord." As part of his story, he shared that the second time he went to the infirmary it was as a choice. Somebody asked if he ever regretted that decision and his answer was, "I know that everybody has a plan and its for a reason... if I didn't come back here I wouldn't have ever met Katie or any of these nice groups, but now that I know Katie I want to get out." After wiping the tears that were pouring down my face, I realized how much he thinks he's gained from us and I don't think he has any idea what I've gained from him. I talked to him later and he explained that he knows he has a path and a plan. He knows that God has him where he is for a reason and he knows he's supposed to help people in his situation later in his life. I can't wait to see him continue to grow and witness his accomplishments.

The evening continued with conversations that could have gone on forever. We went to the other villas and had numerous people coming up to tell him how inspirational he is and even more people giving him any snacks they could find (after his description of the infirmary food) and trying to gather ideas in order to help him. I can only pray that he really will be out of there for good some day and when it does happen, I'll be there to give him a hug and welcome him to a new beginning.

We took Ryan back to the infirmary and I was excited to see Donovan and Dolores sitting in the front of the women's ward. It was dark and they couldn't recognize me at first but I wheeled Ryan over and after handing him a plate we'd made him at dinner he realized who I was. There was only more happiness when I saw that big beautiful smile of Donovan's and he reached his arms around my head to plant a kiss on my cheek. Dolores followed with big smiles and hugs. I was telling Ryan earlier that I can't believe the way things have changed and I went from avoiding the infirmary to trying to be there any chance I have. It's days like today that I realize the simplicity of happiness and it certainly can't be measured by how much you own.

They made it!

Today was arrival day for the work teams and is always one of my favorite days. I love to meet the teams for the first time, see where they're from, show them around and see their fresh excitement. Every time I come back to Jamaica, I pray for my eyes to be opened as if I'm seeing everything for the first time. I never want to find myself in the habit of seeing devastating living situations or chronically ill babies and looking at it as if it's normal. It may be hard to understand, but I want to forever have my heart broken when I see starving children or families without a roof over their head. When you come somewhere for so many years, it's easy to fall into that "going through the motions" attitude. This morning I woke up and prayed to have my heart broken the way His is broken when he sees these things. I'm reading a book, Outlive Your Life by Max Lucado and keep playing an analogy he provided over and over in my head.
He talked about how we all have a nice clam shell around us where we have everything we need right in our nice little shell. As soon as the shell is disturbed by seeing a homeless person, somebody paying with food stamps or hearing about the results of a mission team in Africa... our clam shell's quietly close their doors. We all have a shell and are all guilty of it to a certain level but I think that in the United States we all come with a clam shell and some even provide some for our kids who may go on all of their lives without knowing that they are needed more badly than they could ever imagine to help save and change lives. As I was reading this book I also realized that the underlying happiness and overwhelming joy that is felt here on the island isn't only from the love that is given and the lives that are changed. It's not from the people I see and consider family, those things are all factors that make me undeniably full of joy. The euphoria, however, comes from all of these shells breaking down and opening up, which is what begins to happen for these teams on the first day. All if these high-schoolers are letting down the only social defense they've ever had... their guard... and letting others in while they give back love. It's seeing large groups teenagers gather together without preconceived notions, no judgments, welcoming attitudes and it's all coming together in preparation for the week ahead of us. Monday is another one of my favorite days because they will be going out to the work sites and seeing the reality of Jamaica for the first time.

Anyways, after that tangent... I woke up, Chelle & Corinne made breakfast (fresh pineapple included) and we had a nap and morning by the pool planned for the day. I'm not entirely sure where the day went but I can tell you that as soon as I had my suit on and was stepping in to the pool, a bus rolled up. The first team arrived around 1:00 and was the team I'll be in charge of up at Mirmar. There is nothing that makes my blood pump like working with a new team. I love everything about it... from room assignments to showing them around to answering questions to being with them on the worksites to staying in touch and seeing what God's doing with them. I absolutely love it. Today I walked up to make sure everyone found their rooms and peeked into the kitchen where I found Dorette. As usual, there is no way of explaining how full my heart was after seeing her! She turned around slowly, asked if it was a ghost and then fully turned around yelling "my baby is back my baby is back! I am blessed, I am blessed!" I am so grateful that God has put her into my life... if it's not for anything else it's for me to see what it's like to be with a woman who is grateful for everything she has! I talked to her the day after a family member was in a car accident and when I asked how she was doing, her response was "I am blessed." Her happiness, silliness, constant laughter and personality are irreplaceable. She is my Jamaican mama. The same routine followed when I saw Alma from a distance and she squinted over her glasses before saying "is that katie?" and squeeling before wrapping her arms around me. I'm always in disbelief when I go to the first debrief at the end of the day and compare it to the last night where we hear over and over "I thought I was coming here to give and had no idea I'd be the one taking anything away." The teams continued to arrive throughout the day and once their rooms were found, I hid under a coconut tree to read. I'm finally starting to feel like the cobwebs are clearing out of my brain and I am really excited about working tomorrow.

The day ended dinner and orientation in St. Ann's bay followed by a shower and an immediate face-to-bed maneuver.. Good night! xx

Back on de island

If you know me, you know that Jamaica is my absolute favorite place in the world. My heart and soul are in love with this island, the people, the culture and every ounce of the work that I've had the opportunity to be a part of. I have people here that I consider family and kids that I would take home as my own. I generally spend the time away from Jamaica wishing I was here and while I'm here, I'm usually trying to figure out a way to stay forever. Jamaica has been my heart's home since my first visit and I can safely say that it will be a part of my life forever. With that being said, I have to be honest and admit that this is the first time I have ever had any kind of breakdown before making my way here. I'm at a point in my life where I just finished school and have loans to pay off without a job lined up, I'm in the happiest, healthiest, most amazing relationship I've ever been in and I'm the maid of honor in my sister's wedding, which is the weekend after I leave here. I left home feeling like I was walking away neglecting my finances, leaving somebody that I love and like the absolute worst sister and maid of honor in the world. Believe me when I say I am not writing this as a sob story and am certainly not asking to throw a pity party (unless there's chocolate involved) but getting here today was my first challenging journey to the island. After shedding a few tears (okay, way more than a few) a few hours of sleep and some deep breathing, I made it.

Our flight arrived around 9:45 this morning and customs was completely empty. I was on a flight with Kendall & Nick who will be facilitating this week, as well as 27 kids that were all with IsleGo. Mikey picked them up and I waited with Dalton for Chelle, Ralph & JC to arrive. Even after stepping off of the plane I started to feel my smile start to grow and seeing these people just made me explode with excitement. I haven't had the chance to spend time with Dalton since 2009 and was excited beyond words to spend some time with him. He gave me a tour of the new Montego Bay, which was unreal. There are gigantic shopping markets, general stores, movie theaters and even a chinese food restaurant. I remember the days that we didn't even have paved roads....they're advancing quickly! We stopped and he surprised me with some "i scream" also known as: ice cream. It's always special to have one on one time with somebody because they have so much to share that wouldn't be heard with other people around.

The rest of the day was spent back at the villas catching up with Dusty & Corinne. Dusty and I went into town to visit a house that burned down and we'll be rebuilding this week. It's always so refreshing to meet up with these friends and no matter how much time has passed, we can pick up right where we left off. I am blessed with the people I have in my life all around the world. The day ended with dinner at Passage to India where I got my one Indian meal in for the year. I've been in a bit of a daze after traveling from Hawaii to Arizona to Jamaica and will be working on catching up with sleep and turning my brain back on! I fell asleep writing last night but we've been up this morning for breakfast & meetings to get organized for the teams that are coming in today. This week we'll have teams working on building the community center at Seville, painting the church wall in St. Ann's, rebuilding houses, painting in Exchange and food baskets/infirmary visits and I'm sure multiple other projects that we haven't planned for!